Joe loves the Net. Joe loves surfing the Web. And like many Web folk, Joe loves his Pollstar.com and he’s not ashamed to tell us about it…

Dear Pollstar.com: I noticed you misspelled Wugawugawaca, Minnesota. HOW CAN YOU PEOPLE BE SO STUPID??? You idiots! I don’t know why I even bother with you jerks.

Yes, Joe is one of our best customers. Whenever he’s visiting our Website, whether he’s looking up dates for Fun Lovin’ Criminals, Bob Dylan or American Idols Live, he always finds time to drop us a line…

Dear Pollstar.com: Out here on the East Coast it’s Saturday morning, 12:01 a.m. Why are you still listing Friday night’s shows for Rhonda Vincent & The Rage, Elvis Costello and Aerosmith? Come on, people, get off your butts and update the site, you losers!

In fact, we’d like to do something for all the Joes in the audience…

Dear Pollstar.com: If you don’t correct that misspelling on Wugawugawaca, Minnesota, I’m going to be all over you like a rabid dog on a 10-year-old! You inconsiderate, illiterate dweebs!

It’s because of people like Joe that we’ve made arrangements with every medical center in the United States…

Dear Pollstar.com: How many times do I have to tell you that the dates for Lake Trout and The Lettermen should be listed in a larger font? We’re talking about people’s careers here!

The next time we receive an email from one of the “Joes” in the audience, our custom software will trace the I.P. address…

Dear Pollstar.com: If you don’t fix that mistake, I’m gonna write the mayor of Wugawugawaca, Minnesota, and then you’ll be sorry!

And soon, trained mobile mood therapists will rush to Joe’s home. Utilizing the latest electric shock treatments in conjunction with state-of-the-art mobile lobotomy methods, the therapists will give Joe the treatment he deserves…

Dear Pollstar.com: Do you like kittens? I love kittens. And Deadbolt and Korn and GWAR. But most of all, I love Pollstar.com. Gosh, I’m so happy!

We want all our users to be as happy as Joe…

Happy! Happy! Happy!

It’s just another new service from your friends at Pollstar.com. Have a nice day!